Another save

 change.jpg I am working on a screenplay. 

I thought I was almost done once.  And in comes Max with “Dogshit is not romantic.”  Well, this is true.  Back to script to remove all traces of dogshit.

I am done.  I submit it to a contest.

I get an ah-ha moment.  A change that I think is really needed.  I update the script, submit it to the workshop, get feedback, update the script again.  Okay, now I am done.

Nope.  There are some exercises.    Something about generic verbs.  Like walk.  And Sit.  These are not visual.  And should be replaced.  Again, this is true.

Okay, this should not be too bad, I will check the script and change these.  [On a hunch, I add “stand” in to the mix.] 

Now my script takes place in Manhattan.  So – there is a lot of walking.  And when the characters get tired?  They sit.  Or stand.

I start to change the verbs.  Sometimes I eliminate them all together and rewrite the scene. 

Hey this is taking a long time, let me get a feel for how many there are in here [I am a little reticent to admit this here in public – when I become famous this post gets trashed] :

Walk [or variations thereof] – 98

Sit – 50

Stand – 49

I am up to page 12.  But, it reads so much better.  I just need to finish before February 23 [another topic.]

Another save.  Thanks, Max.


14 responses to “Another save

  1. You will be assimilated.


  2. It is kind of embarrassing that there are [were] so many “walks” in there. Who knew?

  3. I could guess.

  4. Aren’t you afraid that someday a famous producer is going to look at your screenplay and say “Needs dogshit”?

  5. Lines like that you do not fear. You cherish them and save the moment to recount during interviews.

  6. I would take 98 “walks” over a dead protagonist any day.

  7. You laugh, but I tell you, it is hard to continue a story when everyone is dead on page 52.

  8. 56


  9. aj, you crack me up.

    Oy girl, I can attest to max’s power, though. I went through one of her workshops and my writing improved dramatically; true, I switched to prose, but sold a 3 book deal on the basis of a synopsis, she knows whereof she speaks.

  10. Oh aj – you just rushed it. You could have had them die slow and painful deaths but you were too nice.

    Toni – you are right about the power of Max. She has saved me from a romantic comedy with no romance, a romantic comedy where the protag goes back to the bad boyfriend, or where the protag first meets the guy at the end, or where the romance hangs on dogshit, and now where the word “walks” appears 98 times.

  11. Aj, have you ever heard of reincarnation?

  12. I just love Sophia. She doesn’t pick on my faults, she just finds a way to work with them.

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